This play is about four guys who are arguing after a car wreck about who's fault it is. I would love to hear your feedback!
Mind Wreck
5 min play at the scene of a bloody car-wreck. In one car, Mark was driving and Jamie was passenger. In the other, were Wyatt and Dan. All four have blood on them, and Wyatt’s head is bleeding significantly. Eerie John Cage music plays in the background.
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Jamie and Mark are laying on Stage R, their legs in the air. Dan and Wyatt are stage L.
J: What the hell was that?
W: OH. My God! Dan, are you ok?
M: Dude, that sucked.
D: Where am I?
J: Mark, what the fuck just happened?
M: Car accident. Not my fault.
W: You were just in an accident. That jackass came out of nowhere.
D: My leg hurts, I think. I’m not really sure since I can’t move it.
J: HEY! Are you two OK over there?
W: I think so, my friend’s leg is stuck, but he’ll make it.
M: We’re coming to help you!
D: No, I’m fine. Don’t move! You could all have injuries that will be made worse if you move! [to Wyatt] Dude, you’re head’s bleeding.
W: Really? Oh wow, that’s not good.
J: What just happened? I nodded off while you were driving. All I remember is looking at the road, peering off into the distance. I remember thinking that the World was a very large place. Then, I figured out where Bin Laden was. He’s in a cave, in Afganistan. So I went to George W. Bush and told him that the cave’s by the river. He told me that he knew, but he was waiting for re-election to capture him. That’s when the shit hit the fan. Cheney was there, and Rumsfeld. And I turned into a charcoal briquette and Bush and all of their haliburton buddies were pouring lighter fluid on me. BURN FOR THE TRUTH they shouted! No, no… don’t kill the messenger! Then I was riding a bomb down to the ground. Yahoo I yelled, while I waved my cowboy hat at everyone. And right when the crash happened, my life flashed before my eyes. I was sitting on my mother’s lap, then I was striking out in a 4th grade baseball game, then I was on my deathbed, with my ex wife sitting there wishing she had never dumped me.
M: But you’re not even married.
J: Not yet.
M: So how do you know you’ll get divorced?
J: Odds are in my favor. Plus I’m kind of an asshole.
W: Well, since your dream sequence had nothing to do with what really happened, I’ll fill you in. Dan and I were driving down the road listening to the Black Crows, you know, shake your money-maker, and I put the windows down on the truck to get in the groove. I could tell that the highways were going to merge so I sped up and moved over. He (pointing to Mark) came out of no where, hit us, and we ended up as you see us. And I’m pretty sure I went through the windshield.
M: So you merged, and you didn’t even check your blind spot?
W: Please, I have right of weight.
M: You were going awfully fast to be so careless. What’s the matter, your speedometer broken or something?
W: I’ve been averaging 50 miles an hour over the last 30 minutes. I spent 15 minutes going 25 miles an hour, and the last 15 minutes going 75. So, technically, I haven’t been speeding.
M: You were going 75 miles an hour!
W: No, I have gone 25 miles in the last 30 minutes, so therefore I’ve been going 50 miles an hour.
D: But the speedometer is frozen at 75.
W: It must be broken. Man this blood is really dark red.
M: You were speeding, your speedometer isn’t broken, you were going 75, the speedometer measures how fast you were going at that instant.
D: The speedometer is stuck at 75 now, is he still going that fast?
J: No, he’s not. It’s not working now, but it was!
D: If it’s not working now, how do you know that it was before?
M: This is ridiculous! He was going 75 miles an hour at the instant the accident happened!
W: In an instant?
M: Yes! One instant, one precise single solitary instant.
W: But in a single instant, am I really moving at all?
D and J: Oooooooooooooh.
J: Still, how do I know you didn’t try and kill me on purpose?
M: I’ve never met you before.
W: Nor have I met you. What does that prove?
D: There was no motive
J: You people don’t make any sense.
D: Maybe not to you, but I understand it perfectly. We are debating the origin of cause. For a crime, one has to first understand the motive. People like to know why before they assess guilt. In this instance, neither person has cause, so therefore, neither can be charged as guilty. And the causality still remains unknown. If neither of these people did it on purpose, then the event was unavoidable. So the cause isn’t based on free-will. This was all meant to happen. And yet, even saying that something happened presupposes existence. In order for causality to be, forces and people must exist. Just like Descartes said, “I think therefore I exist.” If Descartes is correct, then I must exist. That’s bad news for the rest of you, however. I cannot prove that you exist at all. As far as I know, you might be all figments of my imagination.
(Pause)
M: You people wouldn’t know a car accident if it hit you!
D: I’d like to think I would.
W: I’m still not ready to call this an accident, and I maintain that I wasn’t speeding on this trip.
M: Well I didn’t hit you, I was just driving down the road!
W: I didn’t hit you, I was minding my own business!
J: I didn’t hit anyone! I was sleeping!
D: Don’t look at me, you’re all creepy figments of my imagination!
W: So, then what do we tell the cops- that my head is bleeding for no reason?
J: Where are the cops, shouldn’t they be here by now?
D: We tell them nothing happened. No one did anything wrong. Therefore, there was no accident.
W: Makes sense to me!
J: Well so long as we don’t have to report this to insurance. Even though this wasn’t my fault, they might raise my rates.
D: They can’t raise their rates for something that didn’t happen.
M: Makes sense to me!
D: So it’s agreed. Nothing happened. Everything is as it was, is, and will always be.
J, M: Agreed.
W: Guys, I….. think… I’m… dying. [dies]
M: What’s his problem?
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